Negative Effects Of Divorce On Children

Negative Effects Of Divorce On Children Divorce is the worst situation that a child experiences in the growth and development life which they have to cope up with. The effects divorce has on children depend on age of the child when divorce occurs. Other factors that determines the effects the divorce impacts on children depends on childs personality and the gender, the support offered by other family members and relatives besides the frequency of conflicts and disagreements between parents determines the magnitude of the effect. In consideration of age, young children who are below two years of age are less affected by divorce although this might not be the case when there is a close relationship between the children and the parent (s). These infants do not get to understand the nature of the conflict but nevertheless they react to the changes that accompany divorce. When such a situation is prone to happen, the concerned parents should make special and prior arrangements on childcare and parenting to reduce the negative i nfluence their separation would impact on children (Alison and Cornelia 34). Children who are yet to join school (preschool children) usually takes the blame incase divorce and separation occurs. This is facilitated by their fear of been abandoned and left alone by parents separation. However if separation through divorce occur, preschoolers responds by turning to be uncooperative, angry and depressed. Their personality is also greatly affected and they change completely from their initial socialization when they become aggressive and disobedient towards any adult near them while living a life of denial that nothing happened (DeBord 12). Divorce has the greatest and long lasting effect on school aged children than the young ones. Their personality and emotional attachment to their parent is so strong that they find it extremely difficult to cope up and adjust with the new situation of loneliness of either parent. The difficult situation experienced by elementary children who are school age results from their maturity to understand every bit of situation that is happening with their parents. This age is mature and old enough to comprehend and feel the pain associated with separation from divorce of their parents. The unfortunate part that school age children undergo is the inability they have to control the internal pain caused by divorce (Mary 1). The manifestations associated with effects of divorce on this age group of children are resentment, grief, intensive anger, embarrassment, resentment and divided loyalty. They also tend to be isolated from other children and may develop total withdraw from other childrens activities like creative playing and games. These children live with a hope that their parents will still return together; in case of otherwise, these children feel rejected by the parent who left. Apart from personality and emotional effects, divorce at this age may affect the health of children who may frequently complain of stomachaches and headaches (Eileen and Josephine 23). When divorce occurs during adolescent stage of children, its effects are more severe than any other stage in childs development. Some teenagers feel abandoned, guilt and a sense fear. Their emotional set up is severely disrupted by divorce; they experience loneliness, depression and anger towards other people and mostly their parents especially the one who has left. During this age, the children are mature enough to handle some family responsibilities. However they feel punished and burdened especially when they are responsible for the childcare of their younger siblings. Their response is always swift and they try to fill the gap by assuming adult responsibilities due to high levels of stress and low energy levels with their parents. Some teenagers struggle with sexual desires since they have no one to confine to and experience low self esteem of handling marriage and getting married. Since teenagers understood well the causes and situations surrounding their parents separation and subsequent divorce, their stability in education greatly declines due to lack of concentration and stability, in addition, they are not in a position to deal with future changes occurring in their family life. Children in this age bracket gets themselves in a confused state of mind since they are unable to decide which parent to accept over the other (Hughes 12). The pressure they experience on deciding who to blame for the cause of divorce stress them up affecting negatively their academic life declining in performance since they spend much of their school time evaluating and thinking about the situation back at home. They are also occupied with many thoughts especially if they have assumed responsibilities to take care of their younger siblings. Their emotional status is greatly affected since they experienced whatever happened with their parents; they lose confidence with marriage institutions and do no longer have ability and confidence to handle their family life (Mary 1). Based on gender, children who are raised by parent of the opposite sex are greatly affected by divorce more than boys raised by fathers and girls raised by mothers after divorce. Children raised by opposite sex tend to develop aggressive behaviors and resentment. Emotional disorders are common to children brought up by opposite sex parent while those raised by same sex tends to be responsible and respond to their environments more quickly. Although age, gender and other factors have been identified as influencers of the extent to how children respond or/ and affected by divorce, the most determining factor is the parent to children relationship (Alison and Cornelia 43). However, children should be assisted to adjust to divorce situations in their life. The parent in custody of children should consistently maintain communication and discussion of divorce regardless of how painful it is to the children to help them overcome it. This process will also assure their confidence and adequately prepare them for the future especially the adolescent group who requires understanding in a more detailed manner than younger ones. To recover quickly and reduce the effects of divorce, conflicts and aggressiveness of parents after divorce should be minimized and avoided if possible. Finally disruptions of children should be kept at low levels always and parents should have proper plans of how to deal with after divorce events. Work Cited Alison Clarke and Cornelia Brentano, â€Å"Divorce: causes and consequences,† Yale: Yale University Press, 2006 DeBord Kennedy, â€Å"Focus on Kids: The effects of divorce on children,† North Carolina, Cangage Learning, 1997 Eileen Hetherington and Josephine Arasteh,† Impact of divorce, single parenting and step parenting on children, New York: Routledge, 2001 Hughes Recker, â€Å"Parenting on your own:† Illinois, Routledge, 1999 Mary Temke, â€Å"The effects of Divorce on Children: Family and Consumer Resources,† Retrieved on April 5th 2010 from: http://74.125.153.132/search?q=cache%3AQPgXCQMt0pcJ%3Aextension.unh.edu%2FFamily%2FDocuments%2FDivorce.pdf+The+negative+effects+of+divorce+on+childrenhl=engl=ke

The Contribution of African American Women Essays -- Reflective Histor

The Contribution of African American Women I am not the first. I am not the first Black woman to attend a college or university. I am not the first Black woman to exercise her right to vote. I am not the first Black woman to dream, to be so hopeful for positive change that she sees possibilities in bleakness. I am not the first Black woman to know how it feels to be rejected instead of accepted, to be humiliated instead of acclaimed, to be passed over without lambs blood smeared on her door. I am not the first Black woman to experience America. I stand as a pair of footprints to be made in the sands of time. Before me lay the tracks of my predecessors; brilliant Black women who mastered the art of bending without caving. They battered down doors with fists of iron and wills b...

A Double Edged Sword Cuts Both Ways Essay

The phrase â€Å"a doubled edged sword cuts both ways† means that something has both beneficial and adverse outcomes. The comparison is made to a double-edged sword because it allowed the wielder of the sword to slash on the backswing without having to pivot the weapon in their hand, but it also allowed the wielder to cut themselves on the backswing. The actual origin of the phrase is unknown, but the earliest mentions of it can be found in the Bible. This phrase can be applied to literature, art, music, and society throughout history. The phrase rang true in its Biblical inception and remains relevant in the media of today. Many facets of our society wield double-edged swords from our political issues to our everyday entertainment. I selected this phrase because the broadness of the quote allows it to apply to many subjects across the whole of time. â€Å"A double edged sword cuts both ways† demonstrates that every decision can have consequences and benefits, and itâ⠂¬â„¢s important to think before you act on impulse. In the dramatic short story â€Å"The Tell-Tale Heart†, Edgar Allen Poe demonstrates that humans are not capable of enduring extreme guilt. The story’s narrator lives with an old man and is constantly haunted by the old man’s eye. The narrator is mentally ill, and he decides that he can no longer endure seeing the eye anymore and resolves to kill the old man. After the murder, the narrator hallucinates that he can hear the old man’s heartbeat underneath the floorboards, and he turns himself in to the police to silence the sounds of his guilt. The biggest motif in this work is the concept of time. The amount of time spent with certain actions is never specified, only that it takes a long time to do so. Time is used to describe the heartbeat of the old man right before his murder and the hallucination of it afterwards. Time is what tortured the old man while he was awaiting his death, and time spent dealing with the old man’s eye is what made the narrator insane. My quote is â€Å"a double edged sword cuts both ways†, and, in the context of this story, the truth cuts both ways. â€Å"Yet the sound increased †¦yet the officers heard it not. I talked more quickly —more vehemently; but the noise steadily increased. I arose and argued about trifles, in a high key and with violent gesticulations; but the noise steadily increased.† The narrator is hallucinating that he can hear the old man’s heartbeat. He believes that the officers can hear the heartbeat as well, so he tries to speak louder to cover up the sound. â€Å"Anything was more tolerable than this derision! I could bear those hypocritical smiles no longer! I felt that I must scream or die†¦Ã¢â‚¬â„¢I admit the deed! —tear up the planks! Here, here! —It is the beating of his hideous heart!’† The narrator can no longer bear the sound of his hallucinations and admits to his murder to stop the heartbeat. This coincides with my qu ote because admitting the murder would obviously put him in jail, but it would free him of the hallucinations that he knows are going to push him further into insanity. Admitting his murder is the narrator’s double-edged sword. In the poem â€Å"England in 1819†, Percy Shelley demonstrates that the government can be corrupt just as easily as it can be good. The poem tells of the rule of the dying king and his sons that take over the throne. The people are starving and dying, and the laws and army, which were implemented to protect the people, have turned against them and are now their oppressing force. A major metaphor in this work is the comparison of the government to unseeing, unknowing leeches that live for their own benefit while sucking life from others. This poem is related to my quote because it frames the law as a double-edged sword. â€Å"An army, which liberticide and prey/ Makes as a two-edged sword to all who wield.† This conveys that the army, a force meant to protect the people, has turned against them. â€Å"Golden and sanguine laws which tempt and slay† expresses that the supposedly perfect laws are the r eason for the oppression in England. This corresponds with my quote because the sovereignty of the government can create security or oppression depending on how the power of the government is used. In the science fiction movie The Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Michel Gondry conveys that memories are the best and worst things people can have. The main characters of the movie, Joel and Clementine, meet at the beginning of the movie and quickly start dating. Their relationship takes a turn for the worst, and Clementine goes to a clinic to have all memory of Joel literally erased from her mind. Joel learns about her procedure and decides to do the same for himself. During the procedure, however, Joel becomes consciously aware of all the memories he’s losing and attempts to reverse the process. The most prevalent theme throughout the film is the parallels of Joel and Clementine and Hermes and Aphrodite. Not just the personalities of the deities that are portrayed in the film through the characters, but there are multiple events in mythology between the couple that were cleverly re-enacted in the movie. This film connects to my quote because Joel’s memories are his double-edged sword. Keeping his memories of Clementine would be painful, especially since she had her memories of him erased, and getting them erased would make him forget that pain but at the cost of all of the wonderful times he had with Clementine. Regarding Joel’s consideration to forget the painful memories, he is told, â€Å"Blessed are the forgetful, for they get the better even of their blunders.† On the other side of his sword, Joel has his memory wiped and, after failing to reverse the process, says to Clementine, â€Å"Come back and make up a good-bye at least. Let’s pretend we had one.† Through every step of the movie, before the procedure, during the procedure, after the procedure, and before he even knows the procedure exists, memories serve as a double-edged sword for Joel. In the vivid painting Death of Caesar, Vincenzo Camuccini portrays that misuse of power will have consequences that displace that power. This painting illustrates the stabbing of Julius Caesar by his subjects and fellow court members. The focal point of the painting is Caesar (rather dramatically and arrogantly, even as he’s being stabbed) falling to the ground with several men around him wielding knives. The most apparent symbolism in the painting is depicted with the coloration of Caesar and his attackers. Caesar is depicted in red and his attackers in white. Red is meant to symbolize evil or oppression and white cleanliness or purity. Another man standing near Caesar is also depicted in red; this is believed to be Brutus because he and Caesar were friends, yet he was still the one that initiated the rebellion. Julius Caesar did many fantastic things politically and militarily for Rome, but, after assuming full control over the government, he became a dictator. His power-hungry oppression caused his fellow statesmen to plot against and murder him. The scene illustrated in the painting displays the anger ignited in the conspirators because of Caesar’s misuse of power. The painting is pertinent to my quote because power is displayed as a double-edged sword. â€Å"A double edged sword cuts both ways† is a reminder that everything you do, even if it seems like a good decision at the time, can have consequences. It encompasses the human tendency to be indecisive, to fear the unknown, or to act on impulse to avoid that fear. This quote is woven throughout history, and it’s meaning is still pertinent today. This phrase reiterates the importance of taking the time to weigh out every option and truly understand the repercussions of your actions.

Which Is More Important, Talent Or Hard Work - 1072 Words

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